I would write about my weekend, but I know all of ya’ll are too lazy to go through the process of being authorized to read X-rated sites

So here’s a picture of Scully dog instead.

Before I begin the excitement that will be the rest of today, I want to just take a moment to recognize someone important in my life.

It’s no secret that Reid and I are mad crazy for each other. The past 3 years with him have been anything but smooth sailing. The first week into our relationship, he came speeding to my house with a buck knife to chase off my biological father who was trying to beat down the front door of my mom’s house to “make me sorry” (aka “beat the living shit out of me, again”) for telling him to fuck off after he almost killed my dog. I have never and will never talk to him again after that. A few weeks after that incident, Reid had to take me to the hospital on my 21st birthday because I had pleurisy so bad I got to where I almost stopped breathing at my dinner.
2 months into our relationship I left for Air Force BMT. I was gone from March 30th until June 9th. Reid wrote to me every single day. Sometimes more than once. When I was stuck in the medical discharge squadron, he would print off pages and pages of my favourite forums and websites and mail them to me so I would have something to read (mainly textsfromlastnight and somethingawful choose your own adventure threads).
June 9th when I stepped off the plane around 11:45pm he was standing, toes on the tape that marked where people in the waiting lounge could not pass, with a bouquet of my favourite flowers in my favourite colours (which he actually pilfered from various gardens around his neighborhood). He was there with me for every ER trip I took that year because my migraines were so out of control I thought I was going to die.
The fall after that he moved in with me when I got so severely depressed I couldn’t even get out of bed. He made sure I was fed and did his best to keep me from laying down on the train tracks that were 50yds from our back door. Without him, I surely would have killed myself by now, no if’s and’s or but’s about that. Reid is the only stable thing I’ve ever known in my entire life.

This morning I woke up feeling awful. I had a stuffy nose all night and I was pretty sure I had a slight fever (but then again the house is freaking cold right now since we haven’t run the heat in a good month or so). I knew he had a horrible night the night before and hardly slept. Neither one of us has slept much since my surgery. I rolled over and apologized to him for more than likely keeping him up all night and how I had been nothing but a dead weight (sometimes literally) and a bother all this past week. He didn’t say anything, he just leaned over and kissed me and looked at me with his stormy blue eyes and said he loved me, no matter what.

This man loves me. ME of all people. I can’t even begin to wrap my head around the “why?????” But that doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter why he loves me, what matters is that he does love me. There’s not a lot of people who would not complain at having to pick me up off the couch (and toilet) every day this past week just so I could stand. There’s not a lot of people who would go out of their way to make me as happy as possible, even if it means going across town to get my favourite soup. I’ve never had a boyfriend who could even stand for me to cry in their presence, but Reid is always there, with his arms wide open.

Sure, we have our bad days. There’s things I do that annoy the crap out of him that I wish I could change about myself. I wish for his sake I wasn’t such trash but he doesn’t complain about having a dumpster girlfriend. I thought love was aloof, I thought love was withholding. I thought love was bruises and black eyes. I thought love lasted until they found out you were damaged goods. I thought wrongly.

If there is someone out there who is “the one” (a belief I don’t subscribe to, personally) then I think I’ve found him in Reid. It’s undeniable that we have a special connection. He’s even said to me that sometimes he doesn’t even feel like I’m a different person, but an extension of himself with awesome tits. I feel the same way, although his tits aren’t as awesome.

Anyways, I just really needed to rant about how undeserving I am of a man who is so kind, graceful, forgiving, loving, and awesome. Feel free to vomit now.

I’ll be uploading more pictures later when I get to a place with better wi-fi (my house still has the worst signal everrrrrr. I pay way too much for less than 1mpg download per minute).

Here is Reid and I in front of the Hobbit Hole! Our first picture together for 2013.

It takes a real man to wear a South Park Hello Kitty shirt (I actually have a matching one. The number of matching shirts we have is a bit ridiculous!)

Hope everyone is having a great weekend. I shall be spending the rest of mine on the couch recovering from our adventure

We totally fail at taking good pictures together.

Yesterday, against better judgment, I went to Petsmart with my boyfriend so we could finally meet the newest fur baby we are adopting. We have been going to the adoption event that a local rescue holds every Sunday for some time now (one of my favourite regular dates we go on that we dubbed, “Puppy Brunch”). I had seen a picture of little Holly on the rescue’s Facebook page and fell in love with her right away. She and her siblings were still waiting on their last round of shots before they could come out to an event but we went ahead and put in an application for her anyways.
The plan was that we were going to be taking Holly home with us this weekend to foster until she gets spayed, and at that point we would fully adopt her. Well, obviously with my surgery 2 days prior that wasn’t going to work out anymore, but thankfully her foster family said they would be happy to keep her for us until I’m back on my feet.
Reid spotted her as soon as we walked in the door. He started pointing across the aisle going, “I think that’s our girl!” It was definitely love at first sight. She was so calm when being held and just snuggled right up to Reid and loved being petted. We stayed for a while and watched her play with her siblings before we left. I am really hoping that I will be well enough this weekend to take lil girl home with us!

Hey there everyone! Just thought I’d drop by for a second while I’m still awake before the next dose of pain killers kick in.
I’ll go over quickly the week’s events.
Tuesday night I had some pasta that did not sit well on my stomach and hurt me all the next day as well. Thursday I woke up a mess because I hadn’t eaten anything and was in a lot of pain. I called the surgeon to see if he had any appointment openings sooner than Wednesday 2/13, but they didn’t so they put me on a call-list in case they had a last minute cancellation. I called my GP after I got off the phone with the surgeon to ask him if he could prescribe me anything for the pain, the nurse who took the call went back and talked to my GP told me that he said to go straight to the ER. Reid’s brother came and took me to the ER. I ended up staying in the hospital overnight (Thurs-Fri) because the surgeon on call that night did not seem to want to make a decision on whether or not to take my gallbladder out or make me go through a few more tests (upper endoscopy, ultrasound, never mind the fact that I had already had one). The next morning the surgeon I was supposed to see next week came in, he was disgruntled that no one had told me I was there earlier that morning because he almost couldn’t fit me in. They ended up rushing me to the OR so he could do my procedure and not be too late to a meeting (otherwise I would have either had to go home and wait to come back or stay in the hospital another few days. It only took him about 20 minutes to remove my gallbladder. I woke up in ICU and for whatever reason just started to profusely apologize to the staff there. Reid said that did not surprise him at all and that it sounded exactly like something I would do! Ha!
They discharged me the same day, which I was happy about. I felt amazingly well right after the surgery. The anesthesia didn’t leave me nauseated or anything and not long after I was able to drink and eat some of a clear liquid diet and keep that down with no problem (Wednesday night I could only stomach two small spoonfuls of rice and that made me extremely nauseated). After I was able to keep the liquids down they let me eat some low-fat solid foods. That settled well too. I was really amazed at how good I felt right after. I am really sore and can’t stand up or sit down without assistance but I honestly expected to feel much, much worse. I just feel like I’ve done a thousand too many ab crunches and it hurts like a mofo to laugh! I’ve been trying to watch sadder, more serious movies so as not to make myself laugh. I’m terrified of popping my internal stitches (my surgery was laporscopic and they only made 3 small incisions on my stomach). Hiccuping also hurts really badly.

Now I’m at Reid’s house with his parents. Their house is much better situated than ours for my recovery, they even have a super comfy recliner I was able to get a good night’s sleep in last night.

That’s about it I guess. Tomorrow I get to meet our puppy! We have pushed back our adoption time til after she is spayed so I can have a week-10 days to heal before bringing home another critter. I am so excited! I will post pics when I get them.

Hope you all are having a great weekend! I know I am finally happy to be able to sit on the same couch as Reid and hold his hand some. It sounds terrible but we’re so happy we’ve gotten to spend this much time together the past few days, even if it’s under less than ideal circumstances. I guess that’s a good sign that we can be happy together no matter what is going on.

I am a needy person at times. I recognize this and despite how much I wish it weren’t so, sometimes I have to just come to terms with it.

This is one of those times. Not only do I have to deal with the fact that I am unable to bear everything alone like I want to (so as not to burden others, I loathe that), but I kinda have to have these needs filled in order just to function at this point.

It was bad enough to get the call that there was actually, really something going on with my body to the point where I need surgery (honestly, I was really starting to pull for Team “It’s All In Your Head, It Wasn’t Real” and expecting the scan results to come back normal) but then I got to listen for about an hour and a half about how much my biological father hates me and my sister and wants nothing more to do with us. “When do I finally get to stop being a parent? They’re too old for this shit, I’m done. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

Granted, I cut ties with the bastard 3 years ago this past month. I’ve never planned on ever speaking to him again, but still, you know, there’s that little part of you that just hopes you’re wrong. Maybe people really can change. Maybe that dad that I loved so so so much as a kid is still in there. Maybe, just maybe, he actually loved me at some point. But no. I’m right, again. I’d love to be wrong. I would be so happy being wrong, because then I’d be loved by the person I loved the most in my entire life. I was such a daddy’s girl. I could not wait for his dualie to pull up in the drive way after being gone weeks/months. I kept count as soon as I could of the time he spent away, counting down the days til he got home. I stopped keeping track when I was 14; at that point he had been gone a total of 8 years of my life. I spent all that time waiting. I could go on with this but there’s really no use in it. Point is, sometimes you realize when something is not worth waiting for anymore.

I kinda lost it. I mean, I figured out that he really didn’t care for me a few years ago when he threatened to physically assault me. But I thought maybe cutting him off would make him remorseful and change. Maybe he’d really try this time to have a relationship with me. But no. I know my mom took no delight in telling me these things, since she is the one who told me about all that he’s been saying. I told my partner tonight that I need to FEEL loved. I *know* I am loved. Very much. After I got off the phone with my mom, I was so happy to be able to go to my afternoon desk at work which is right between R’s parent’s offices. I know they love me. They don’t even have to love me, I’m not even family yet, but I know they love me. I know R loves me, that’s why I didn’t feel like it would be a burden to tell him what I really, really needed, and that was to actively feel loved. I needed my hand held all night. I needed to hear, “I love you” every 5 seconds. I needed to practically be velcro’d to him (physical touch is my biggest “love language”). And I got exactly that. I know with R that if I say I need anything or want anything, that he loves me and he will be there for me. That is such a nice change. Sometimes I expect him to act like my dad. I mean, you’re always told that if you’re a girl you’ll find someone who’s like your dad/ boy someone like you’re mom but that isn’t true in my case. R and my dad couldn’t be more polar opposites.

I think it’s dumb that I need to feel loved when I know damn well I am loved. But you know what? For the first and probably one of the few times in my life, I have people (friends online and in real life, family by blood and family by choice) that don’t think that is a dumb thing to need and are more than happy to help meet that need.

And I couldn’t be more grateful.

Some of you who follow along may remember that I’ve been having some issues with pain in the upper right quadrant of my abdomen and I’ve had several tests done over the past few weeks to pinpoint the cause. I had an ultrasound Jan. 22 which came back normal. I had a HIDA scan last Thursday and got the results from that today.
Long and short of it is that my gallbladder is basically non-functional and while the ultrasound showed no stones, the HIDA scan showed that the gallbladder wasn’t hardly ejecting bile at all and when it was it was not doing it properly and that there isn’t anything that can be done to treat it except to have it surgically removed.

I have an appointment to talk to a surgeon next Wednesday. I’m hoping they can have me in for surgery by the end of Feb (that way I get enough time in at work for rent and bills and hopefully will be recovered enough to go to Reid’s cousin’s wedding mid-March).

I guess it’s my turn to be crippled for a bit. God knows I’ve done more than my share of picking up the slack for everyone else for the past 8 months

So there’s the update. Glad to have a definitive answer and course of treatment, even though it’s surgery.

As some of you all may have noted from my previous post, my partner, Reid, and I are planning on adopting a puppy this weekend. We are very excited and nervous at the same time. We both have had dogs before (my dog was put to sleep before Christmas, he was 13. Reid’s dog is still kicking it at the ripe old age of 17!) BUT we’ve never had puppies. Both of our dogs we got when they were already adults.

At first we wanted to adopt an older dog, but with our other critters we figured it would be best to get a puppy (as well as the foundation we are actually adopting her through. We’ve been talking with them for several months now about adopting through them).

The puppy we will be getting is a Basenji mix (not sure what breed the stud was but the mom is Basenji). The foster mom said that she does bark (she is the runt of a litter of 4, only one of them they haven’t heard bark yet!) but she is very cuddly and friendly. I am so excited to meet her this weekend.

I have been doing tons of research online but figured the more tips and resources there are to use the better!

So, dear readers and fellow animal lovers, do you have any resource suggestions? Tips on housebreaking a puppy? Any tidbits of advice any of you all wish you had before getting a puppy?